wasted space

by the smallest one

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credits

released March 1, 2017

instruments/vocals: mason mcconnell
album art: Gordon McBryde
mastered by: Radio Ready PR

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about

the smallest one Calgary, Alberta

my name is mason & i like to write songs about things.

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Track Name: oh deer
you wake up,
& you’re waiting at a red light.
by the time it turns,
you’re too shook up to move.
everyone behind
begin to lost their minds.
& you just sit there.
& as they pass, they laugh & stare.
& when you finally go,
you drive so safe & slow.

the backdrop turns to black.
the cars all disappear.
you’re the only one,
so you step on the gas.
a deer comes into sight.
you veer off to the right,
& you swerve into the lake.
& in the air, you give your thanks
to the animal, for saving you
from the prison of your brain.
Track Name: the bottom of the cliff
pointed all their cameras
from the bottom of the cliff,
fingers crossed they’d get the perfect shot.
gathered up the masses,
& chased them to the edge,
& filtered history with what they caught.

& they watched all those helpless creatures dive –
for dollar signs, they claimed it suicide.
&, though the truth is often painted grey with lies,
its colours always re-emerge with time.

crowded all around
at the bottom of the building,
fingers crossed the man would change his mind.
the worry of the masses
turned into static noise –
though well-intentioned, it couldn’t carry him inside.

& they watched the body carving through the clouds,
& a frantic wave of panic washed across the crowd.
&, ‘cause his heart could never sputter out a sound,
he thought he’d be better off inside the ground.
Track Name: the mountain, the tree, & the ocean
the mountain grew eyes today,
& i saw
tears rolling down her face,
as she watched
everything go to shit
at the touch of their skin;
the ice is getting thin.

the tree grew a heart today.
i could sense
a deep state of disarray
inside his chest,
as he found all his friends
tumbling down. he was next.
then the rest.

the ocean grew wings today,
& i watched:
as she tried to fly away,
she got caught
in a giant box.
& so, she won’t know
what it’s like to be the sky.
& now she’ll never find out.
Track Name: circles
you reach into
that frozen box,
& pull a bottle out,
without a thought.
like your grandfather,
& like your dad,
you’re always sad,
but can’t say why.

but you can’t possibly believe
that the morning
will set you free.
just open your eyes, & you’ll see
that this relief
is only temporary.

you stick that needle
in your arm;
it’s the only way, now,
to get you calm.
anxiety, it permeates,
& your body aches
for so much more.

well, a cycle will never break
if you keep spinning
in circles, every day.
& there are far too many gates –
with welcome space –
to let yourself go to waste.
Track Name: tall as trees
watched his head grow
as tall as trees;
the difference was he knew
& controlled what he perceived.

& i know it’s insecurities
that fuel his vanity –
something buried far too deep.

& when the wind blows
his leaves away,
the sky’s always to blame.
& all the wistfulness
eating at his heart's
an injustice he can’t take,
so he masks the pain
with a smiling face,
& a cluttered brain,
just hoping that he won’t break.
Track Name: wasted space (we're not that big)
your brothers turned their backs,
& left you out on the street,
with nothing but a piece of chalk,
& a canvas of concrete
(for all your dreams).

but when you looked down to the ground,
all the grey had been taken over,
so you searched for other ways
to bear the days.
that's when you gave us your time.

now, every day, we await
your return to our tree.
& we’re thankful for your presence;
without you, we’d go hungry.
we’d go hungry.

well, your name has been stripped away,
& you’ve been made to feel like wasted space.
& i’m sorry – so sorry – for everything.
if you were small enough,
we’d love so much to take you in,

but we’re not that big.
we’re just not that big.
Track Name: always
always searching for a cause.
but when there’s nothing,
you dream one up.

always packing things away
in tiny boxes,
too small to house them.

well, it’s easier to love
the things that you make up –
whether it’s a friend, or a god,
or a story you’ve written in the mud.

always running from a ghost
you’ve conjured up
to save you from yourself.

always feeling so goddamn special,
& using us
to rid your superstitions.

well, it’s easier to carve
perfect patterns in the stars,
& credit some designer,
than to wander calmly in the dark,
& to trust the hum within your heart.
Track Name: whistle & hum
oh, what an ugly mark we’ve left,
building towers with the dust we’ve swept.
someday, we’ll see just what we’ve done -
until then, let’s just whistle & hum.
Track Name: some
i’m going to a wedding, darling.
will you come along,
as my plus-one?

we can share a meal,
& watch the people drink
themselves into an early grave.

the sun is swallowed by the hillside,
& the stars begin to shine,
but not an eye looks above.

the people dance around to sounds
that scare away the birds,
& all our friends back underground.

but they don’t understand
what they’re getting themselves into.
some just aren’t meant for one,
& some can’t even recognize their own reflection.
& though the clock, it screams into the past,
they hide behind fake cataracts.

but who am i to call them out?
no, i’ll just keep my thoughts inside,
where they belong.
Track Name: progress (a new home)
spending resources to find you a new home,
just to destroy it all again.
moving forward at the cost of all the rest –
you say, “that’s just the price we have to pay.”

sending shuttles, armed with messages, away –
desperate cries of self-defeat.
pray to the empty sky for answers, every day; but
what makes you think they even want to meet?

but you keep trying;
you’ve got heart, i’ll give you that.
just what’s missing is a soul –
that’s probably why we’re left alone.
Track Name: your kind
i hear you’d like to separate
yourself from everything you hate;
society is digging its own grave.

association with that group
is more dreadful than death, to you.
you hope that some catastrophe would strike.

but dear, know you’re good.
you're not alone in this.
the shame you feel will pass,
as long as you keep a sharp eye out
for your kind.
Track Name: machines
remember
all the old stories
that we were told,
to scare us
from their contraptions?
we thought
they were all just lies.

i never thought
we’d see these fictions
come to life.
i must admit:
i wish we listened,
now, as i look to the time

when i turned back,
& cried,
as you got caught
in its path.
you just weren’t fast
enough,
& that machine
split you in half.

& i died inside.
Track Name: a matter of time
it was a cosmic leap -
at first felt like a dream,
but slowly found it to be true.

gave it some time to set.
lent it a name,
& let nature do all the rest for you.

but was it just a matter of time
before it left your soul behind?

then our heads began to grow;
through several cycles - sun & snow -
witnessed, first hand, history repeat.

was this an accident,
or brought about by careful hands -
another chance to get it right?

or is it just a matter of time
before this spark spreads like a wildfire?
Track Name: the day we were saved
they flashed their guns,
& forced us to surrender.
although we fought so much
to protect our families
from the intruders,
it wasn’t quite enough.
sorry.

we were packed behind the glass
for their own entertainment,
before we even had a say,
whether or not
they could enslave us.
i guess that’s just the way it goes.

then, that day, in late july,
from deep space, they came,
& placed them in the cages,
before they had time
to retaliate.

that was the day we were saved.
Track Name: was this all worth it?
the mountain, the tree,
& the ocean all huddled up,
& made an agreement
to stick around, no matter what.

the street lights & the lanterns
looked up to the sky,
& wondered what it’s like
to be alive.

the raindrops were brushed off
the big, blue umbrella,
& questioned what they did wrong,
as they all fell to their death.

the curtains, the locks,
& the screens kept the people safe
from their kind; & they sigh –
are they happy in their caves?

when everything has gone away,
& we no longer have a name;
& the memories we have made
all inevitably fade;
& everything around us dies –
& we’ve no time to say goodbye;
a pale, grey dot in the night sky –
it meant so much to us one time;
well, what was the purpose? –
& was this all worth it?